niki

I KEEP HAVING A RECURRING DREAM

NANCY BOTWIN IS A DOCTOR AND SHE’S TALKING TO THE SUBWAY HERO WHO THEN WHISPERS SOMETHING TO HER AND SHE IS ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED. LIKE, HORRIFIED AND TERRIFIED AND IN SEVERE DISTRESS.

And then this Ethiopian woman needs to read the bible, but chooses one in English instead of Amharic.

Tumblcrush, part two.

<Blair> Don't talk about our piggy like that.
<Marshall> I would suck his dick, but that's not a good thing.
<Niki> OMG?

My cat LOVES plastic bags.

“ I’m saving myself for marriage, so before we have relations we have to sanctify our union in the eyes of god. Then I’m going to make love to you until you hate your fucken cunt.

— Stan Smith, American Dad. They bleep the last two words which just makes it even more lol.

Tearjerker is the BEST episode of American Dad EVER.

Vodka Belt, Beer Belt, Wine Belt.

Dear Iran, thanks for inexplicably becoming, like, my sixth largest visiting country this week? I hope my repeated homosexual comments do not result in your humiliating executions.

DREAM CATFIGHT

Kathy Griffin vs. Janice Dickinson.

(via planettampon)

Uhh, and? Music killed her husband. This isn’t news. Y’know, chances are every murderer ever has heard a song within 24 hours of killing. Music is the new dihydrogen monoxide?

Tumblcrush

<Niki> He'll want to be the pig on our spit.
<Blair> OMG TOTALLY.
<Blair> You're doing him in the butt.
<Niki> I WANT THE FRONT HALF.
<Blair> He can suck my dick.
<Niki> DAMNIT!!!
<Blair> Suck shit.
<Niki> Ahahahahahahahahhahahaha.

What’s worse: that phrase in general, or my “visited links” evidence?

The Dark Knight isn’t Eisenstein. It’s just really fucking cool. There’s a difference between a really well done and exciting “cool” movie and academic high-cinema. The Dark Knight is a comic book movie. And it’s the best comic book movie ever made. I loved it, but it’s not one of the best movies ever. It’s entertainment, not high culture.

I love seeing movies alone because I get to form my own opinions about them. For some reason, the nature of the cinema makes opinions very malleable, and if you really thought objectively about some of the movies you’ve seen in the past, chances are you’d realise that the opinion you have of it is really the opinion of your noisier friend.

All too often, leaving the cinema results in an acceleration of opinion. What was “ordinary but watchable” twenty minutes ago just needs a glass of wine and a slice of pizza to turn into “bloody awful”. Let it go. To bring it up day after day after day is tiring.

DEAR SCIENTISTS

Please find the cure for pooing and peeing. I’m tired of doing those things.

“ I just flew in from the battered women’s shelter and boy are my arms tired!